Growing up, I had so many “friends” phase in and out over the years. I had one really true best friend all through high school, and it really taught me the importance of finding value and worth in those around me. I was so much more content having one really honest, true best friend instead of a ton of friends that didn’t really care about me as a person. I was far from the most popular, but that was okay, because I had a friendship that popularity could never replace.
As I grew older and ventured off into college, I saw the same patterns. I was so attracted to friendships that were fun and effortless. It was nice to not have to always have deep conversations and just go drinking and bar hopping instead! When I finally went through my breakup, I started seeing there were so few people in my life that truly cared. I made a few wonderful best friends when I was in college, and they stuck through the bar hopping and terrible sobbing with me, no questions asked.
My college roommate, Liz, was also my sorority sister. We shared a bedroom, as well as our closets and all of our life problems, for two years in the sorority house. As much as we bickered, Liz was one of the best friends I have ever had. Of all the people I met in college, Liz has the biggest heart. She was the true definition of selfless, and it took me forever to realize how blessed I was to have her. I had so many drunken nights after my breakup that she carried me up the stairs, ordered me pizza or listened to me ramble, even when she had an 8 AM chem exam the next morning.
I met my little, Christian, a year into my time in Lexington. She was everything I am, but totally unfiltered. The sass was beyond real, she balanced out my sensitivity with her outspoken personality, and her love of bourbon and country music soothed my soul. We were the perfect big/little duo, and she was everything I needed in a best friend. Being a year younger, she brought out the crazy in me. We would hold hands and dance on tables, or share her twin-size dorm bed and watch Netflix and cry about how much we hated boys. When I was complaining way too much (which was all too often), she was the first to tell me to shut my mouth and count my blessings.
When I transitioned to Texas, I met my most recent best friend, Emily. She was a devout Jesus-loving party animal, if you can imagine that uncanning combo. Her heart was so pure, and she never sees bad in anyone. When I first met her, she was telling me how she wanted to sell her car so she could afford to go on a mission trip… basically she would do anything for anyone. She was also insanely beautiful and had the best winged eyeliner game I have seen to this day. I was so thankful that she welcomed me into their friend circle, because being the new girl in a college town when you aren’t going to college is probably one of the hardest life experiences ever. Emily and I became co-workers, as well as attached at the hip. Her carefree spirit was a perfect balance to my uptight-ness. She is the Serena to my Blair, because no other combo of best friends could be more accurate.
Each of these girls has a special place in my heart. They have been there to hold my hand (and my hair), to listen when I have my drunken rambles, to help stop my ugly Kim K. cry face… But most of all, they’ve shown me that, no matter how many men you’ve loved, best friends are your real soul mates in life.
I wanted to share just a little part of each of my dear soul sisters with you so you might also realize, it’s not the quantity, but the quality of people you surround yourself with in this life. Don’t hold anyone to unrealistic standards, because we all make mistakes and have our bad days. None of my best friends live in the same zip code as me, but I could share a glass (or whole bottle) of wine with them on Facetime and get lost in the hours of conversations. Find those that value you for you, that don’t judge when you finish the last slice of pizza, and that don’t flee at the first sign of trouble. I can promise your heart will be happy, regardless of your status of popularity.
“Only a few actually care, the rest are just curious.”